You don’t owe anyone anything

I unfriend people all the time (and block too).

I recently unfriended someone who kept ranting ‘liberalism is a disease.’ I can appreciate not agreeing with a point of view, but that kind of reductionist simpleton thinking? Pass.

He messaged me asking why I was being passive-aggressive…

Just a reminder – you don’t owe anyone anything. You don’t owe them your friendship. You don’t owe them your time. And you definitely don’t owe them an explanation for YOUR choices.

People talk a lot about their FB feed being shitty – two simple steps to make it better:

1. News feed eradicator. Remove it from yo life (I did this a few years ago)

2. Just unfollow/unfriend people saying cockamamie things. You’re here to live your life, not one that makes someone else happy.

Posted on January 14, 2019 | Comments | Permalink

This isn’t about you

Last week was a bit of an explosion. I wrote for Ramit’s site (which he emailed on), I was featured on Nathan Chan’s Foundr Podcast, and it seems like Brian Clark mentioned our unemployable podcast again.

This resulted in roughly 50 people contacting me. Most said hi (after joining SJO.com), but about a dozen wanted to chat.

And this is where it gets brutal…

Not a single person made a compelling case. Going to someone you don’t know with “lets chat” or “I want you to mentor me” or (the worst) “I want to pick your brain” causes me to only respond with one word: Why?

Time is the single most precious thing you own (and control), and I guard mine like a zealot.

If you’re reaching out to someone and want to chat with them, there is one basic truth: show them you are an awesome person to chat with. Make them understand it’s worth their time.

It may sound dickish, but…

The reality of the Internet is there are far too many talkers, and just not enough do-ers. Most people simply do not have the bandwidth to differentiate between who is awesome and who is just rattling cages.

So next time you reach out to someone, make a compelling case. I mean hell, if I (as a D minus minus eCeleb) can barely manage this, I can only imagine what it’s like for people with actual followings.

Posted on January 09, 2017 | Comments | Permalink

Have SOME self-awareness.

Had a friend send me an internet marketer’s website. His job description is literally “I teach you how to make money online.”

On the about page he had the usual “leader” “speaker” “investor” and all that.

But the last one?

“Freedom fighter.”

🤦‍♂️

Posted on January 08, 2019 | Comments | Permalink

Build a relationship (and some real grinding)

One of the little things I try to do is have a relationship with the owners/managers/employees of places I frequent.

Coffee shops. Cookie spots (of course). Convenience stores. Gym. Etc.

So I went to pick up some clothes from the tailor today, and we started chatting. I asked her about her New Years, and she dropped this on me:

“I took four days off. First time in 18 years I’ve taken four days off.”

Whaaaaaaaa??

Note that the four-day vacation was around Christmas. With the 24th on a Monday, she decided to live a little and take Saturday Sunday Monday and Tuesday off.

With New Years she just took Jan 1 off – other days were business as usual.

Here’s a small business owner with half a dozen employees and a store that I rarely see empty… and she’s never had four days off in a row until now.

That’s some real hustle and grind.

Posted on January 03, 2019 | Comments | Permalink